My Extra…

No, she is not an EX, she is an EXTRA.

When I call it quits, I really effin quit. I notice everyone isn’t the same way. Get with it. It is so healthy people.

We broke up and I was done. She had lots of time to get it right. She didn’t, so I left the relationship. She may have thought I was bullshitting, but I really wasn’t. I was dead serious. Some people really think, when they “come around” you should be waiting. Nah, I have shit to do. You know, living my life.

We are just going to call her “Extra.” I think most exes should be called extras. They usually do extra shit, want extra attention, and feel they should be extra special. No, eff you, Lol.

She was not ready for a real relationship. She felt she was more than ready. Lies. We had some good times, but that was not enough to sustain a healthy relationship. I have also come to the conclusion that she has never had a healthy relationship. She told me about most of her serious relationships, and they were all unhealthy, IMO. To really think that we could have a healthy relationship, is pretty nuts. It was clear. I think I was on some “Save-a-hoe shit.” You know the whole, “I know what she has been through, but I can show her what real means.” I knew early on that I had to work with her. I was willing to do my share, if she was willing to do the same.

She started texting, calling (a few times) emailing, im’ng, and shit like that. Why? Why are you doing all this shit? You weren’t going that hard when we were together. You weren’t saying how wrong you were when I was deciding if I wanted to be in the relationship. I am one of those people who does not like to hear all that shit when I am done. I actually feel annoyed! Don’t send me this virtual shit, Maam.

She was hitting me up in every virtual way possible to give me “half-apologies” and random shit. Very random. I would not respond to anything. I had nothing to talk about; I had talked more than enough. I guess this was her closure. Even though I was ignoring everything, she would send me dumb-ass texts. Like “Johnson & Johnson as a new Honey lotion, it is banging.” Really? Someone is ignoring you for months, and you must tell them about a new lotion? Crazy.

She wanted me to give her more chances. No.

I honestly felt like when she had it, she didn’t want it. She was figuring things out. Well, I figured it out, Honey. I figured she was a waste of time. I would rather just let her deal with her life and the people in it. She had issues with boundaries, she never set any up. She had issues with closure, she never closed any chapters.

There was nothing I could do for her, even though I told myself I could. I thought we could be good together. No. She was a liar.

She always wanted to move back down south. She lived there for a very short time with an “Extra” that she had a dysfunctional relationship with. Well, she still wanted to go back there even though they were no longer together. Why is she chasing her? That was one of my issues too. She was still hung up on fucked-up-teeth girl the whole time.

She admitted that no one has ever cared or treated her like I did. She didn’t know what to do with it, it was very unfamiliar. She couldn’t figure out why I treated her so well. Example: She thought it was odd that I told her I would go to the emergency room with her to have her foot examined. She dropped something on it, and thought it might have been broken. She was limping around in pain, so I made her go check it out. I stayed with her the entire time. This is normal to me. If your with someone and they are going to the emergency room, you should automatically go with them, unless you can’t. Why, not? She told me that no one has ever done that before. She had “Extras” that would drop her off and go right back home if she had an emergency. Just told her to call when she was done. I bring this up to show the kind of treatment she was used to. She told me this way later, and I thought “wow.” If someone WOULDN’T do that, I wouldn’t want to be with them.

When women are used to being treated like shit, you should treat them like shit too, or leave them alone, lol. They will not understand anything different. I am joking, but not really.

It is sad when people can not accept love and care. It is sad when all people know is hurt, lies, pain etc. Once I washed my hands of her and her drama, she realized what she lost. It was too late; she wasn’t worth the headaches.

Why do you have to lose someone or something, to realize how important it/they are in your life?

I had to just separate myself from her and her drama. She has this cycle of bullshit going on. She let her ex’s treat her like shit, and then refused to leave them alone. She treats people like shit and expects people to just accept it, because that is what she does. Dysfunctional.

The other day out of nowhere she texts “_____’s new number.” Really? We have not spoken in how long? Do you really think I need  updated contact information? I had had enough of the foolery. I told her I did not need her new number, because I was not going to use it. I don’t need an update on anything because I could care less. She claims it was sent to her entire “call log” and she would delete me. Thanks.

Oh, the number had a down south area code. I guess, she did move down south there after all.

Bye.Bitch.Bye. I mean, enjoy your life and I hope we all learn from our experiences.


  1. I will admit I have a problem with “hoarding” exes. I was laughing when I read this posting… I was like hey I might do this too..and I wonder if any of the “sane” girls that I have dealt with who cut me the eff off because I deal with exes is feeling the same way you are feeling about ur ex …I dont know why Its hard to kick my addiction to exes…I really dont like drama..but I always find myself in it…I tend to go back to exes thinking things will be different since we had some time apart to grow and learn from the bullshit that we experienced the first time around…

    Part of my problem is I hate having to get to know new people…there are different phases and for some reason its always the same bullshit ….phase one..the girl will tell me that she wants the same things that I do in a relationship..phase 2…she will “pretend” that she is everything that I have been looking for.. and then 6 months later the shit changes…all of the sudden she wants something totally different.. phase 3…we start arguing and shit every day about small stuff because I’m really not who she wants, and I am pissed about being deceived….phase 4…she tries to convert me into something I’m not, only to find out that I am not going to change anything that I feel doesnt need to be changed…but anyway…phase 5 rolls around and this is when we decide to take a break or break up…phase 6..I end up dealing with some people who treat me like shit (worse then her)…phase 7…Ill decide that I am willing to settle for my exes bullshit, because its not as bad as the new chick I just met…phase 8…I try to and i-m nice things that may cover up the fact that I cursed her out 6 months ago while saying “im so fucking done with u!” repeatedly….

    Sometimes I think that I am being too picky..and I have to remember that not everything is going to be perfect about my mate..I am quick to end shit or not care if the relationship ends because of the “not so important” issues…those issues will overpower the positive things about a person ..things that really matter…which is why “I dont know what I have until its gone”..stupid issues are easily forgotten…and it happens on both sides of the fence..women will stop dating me becuase of something stupid and then go mess with someone who really doesnt give a damn about them and then be like o i want a second chance…which is where the reuse reduce “recycle” comes into play…

    I have a soft heart and i try to believe that people do grow and change from certain experiences…even though half of the time that shit isnt true (which is why an ex may become and ex-ex)..i dont like going through life not knowing if it could have or would have worked the second time around…although things can be recycled there are still parts that will remain the same…its just up to the person to decide on whether or not if what they have is worth salvaging


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